tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3771730470771017640.post5913504808888278673..comments2024-01-28T03:52:10.828+00:00Comments on A Painful Awakening...: Standing in the way of controlEmmaJanehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02724090720166508110noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3771730470771017640.post-69659913995652004012009-09-03T12:08:37.986+01:002009-09-03T12:08:37.986+01:00Wow, beautifully written.
I struggle with this a...Wow, beautifully written. <br /><br />I struggle with this a lot, as Abel said "hen the spanking feels very real, very painful, very unwelcome." Which can be pretty often, when you're living in a world full of hairbrushes and canes. I haven't found a solution yet, though, of course, communication helps. <br /><br />But takes a lot of courage and trust just to be able to say to Caroline Greyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06049175847242140285noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3771730470771017640.post-54753218323808605742009-09-02T21:37:37.230+01:002009-09-02T21:37:37.230+01:00I'm behind the times again, catching up with b...I'm behind the times again, catching up with blogs, but I did want to say thanks for starting such an interesting and thought-provoking discussion.Indyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11949593044223905786noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3771730470771017640.post-38850797871080949482009-09-02T13:27:18.331+01:002009-09-02T13:27:18.331+01:00Do you feel this relates at all to your concerns a...Do you feel this relates at all to your concerns about submission, as distinct from the role of 'bottom' in a play scene? Consider the quote: "My favourite part of playing is to completely give up control, to let myself go."Ms. Stickhttp://fetlife.com/users/30956noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3771730470771017640.post-68846532776097147722009-09-02T10:43:43.686+01:002009-09-02T10:43:43.686+01:00EmmaJane, don't know how I missed this entry.
...EmmaJane, don't know how I missed this entry.<br />Just dealing with it isn't alway easy.<br />Thanks for posting this frank post, it just goes to prove the importance of communication, if you and HH hadn't been able to talk it out it would have been very bad for both of you.<br />Warm hugs,<br />Paul,Paulhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03790580459962602757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3771730470771017640.post-25124402543031166972009-09-01T19:58:16.399+01:002009-09-01T19:58:16.399+01:00Thanks for all the lovely comments which have help...Thanks for all the lovely comments which have helped to reassure me and realise it happens, jsut deal with it.<br /><br />@Mandy very glad to know it's not just me, thanks.EmmaJanehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02724090720166508110noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3771730470771017640.post-27165613277325636222009-09-01T16:31:19.789+01:002009-09-01T16:31:19.789+01:00I'm so relieved to read your post because I ha...I'm so relieved to read your post because I had a very similar experience recently.<br /><br />It was a hard session, I tried to get into the right headspace but found myself getting angrier and angrier. I was stamping my feet, he added more strokes and finally I opened the door and just stormed out of the room and I could not look at him for a long, long time. <br /><br />Still don't Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10847815006725096094noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3771730470771017640.post-16566120070632699932009-09-01T14:06:24.565+01:002009-09-01T14:06:24.565+01:00This is the sort of thoughtful, open and perceptiv...This is the sort of thoughtful, open and perceptive entry that makes your blog so good. This sparked a couple of not terribly coherent thoughts from me, aside from wanting to give you a big hug, but I'll try and see if I can make sense of them...<br /><br />No matter how well planned a scene, no matter how well the players know one another, there'll always be moments of surprise - when Abel1234https://www.blogger.com/profile/14256647943001266865noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3771730470771017640.post-67262776144049585282009-08-31T23:48:26.732+01:002009-08-31T23:48:26.732+01:00I can see why, after a demanding week in the vanil...I can see why, after a demanding week in the vanilla working world and being the weekend organiser, it could be very difficult to switch off and resist topping from the bottom - and then getting preoccupied with your feelings about that behaviour. <br /><br />Both of you appear to understand that, don't beat yourselves up (other than in the nicest possible way). Even a weekend escape Master Retephttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04311695282682721027noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3771730470771017640.post-38238838290062543082009-08-31T23:12:41.246+01:002009-08-31T23:12:41.246+01:00Very well and openly written. I can see myself hav...Very well and openly written. I can see myself having the same kind of desire to control although trying to give up exactly that.. definitely need to overcome the urge to top from the bottom.Juliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17485430110180081280noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3771730470771017640.post-50517105918827556032009-08-31T23:00:06.497+01:002009-08-31T23:00:06.497+01:00@HH yes it was a great weekend, I shan't argue...@HH yes it was a great weekend, I shan't argue that point :)EmmaJanehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02724090720166508110noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3771730470771017640.post-31042620045230891612009-08-31T22:54:36.436+01:002009-08-31T22:54:36.436+01:00Yes, there are some very interesting issues here.
...Yes, there are some very interesting issues here.<br /><br />Of course you're right that in general the bottom offers the top control and he takes what is offered. In that sense he can't take what isn't given - at least within the bounds of consent.<br /><br />But it's not really as simple as that. Most bottoms <i>want</i> to be able to give in, to surrender to the scene (which Henry Higginshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11351558169910277035noreply@blogger.com