Eliane posted a while ago about switching and wondered would she ever switch from bottom to top. It reminded me of similar thoughts I'd had on that subject and the first time I ever topped anyone. At the time I posted about it on Fetlife and have reposted below. I was a little confused, as I had always thought myself to be 100% bottom and couldn't believe how much I'd enjoyed my first taste if topping!
I was advised not to concern myself too much with ill fitting labels, but to keep an open mind and not be afraid to experiment. It's an approach I've continued to take and it would be my one piece of advice to others starting out: if it feels right, then it is right.
While playing with some like-minded spanking friends over the weekend something strange happened. I don't mean the usual high jinks and all sorts we get up to when we play, but something strange for me.
Although I'm relatively new in the scene I have played in private for years, always as a bottom or sub. And even going back to my earliest 'spanking' related memories or associations, I've always been interested and gravitated towards the role of bottom/sub. I have never once fantasised about Topping or Dominating anyone. I like being spanked, disciplined and controlled. And in my usual introductions with new kinksters I announce firmly that I'm 100% bottom/sub and happy (almost relieved even) that I'm not a switch. For me it seems so complicated, working out when to Top and when to bottom and when to switch over!
But at the weekend while playing with another female bottom and a male switch I gave my first ever spanking; well two spankings actually!
Not quite sure how it came about but all of a sudden I had this very nice tall man over my knee. And even though I'm quite small (5 foot nothing!) and was wearing the cutest little schoolgirl's uniform, it all felt very natural to have him there and arrange him into a suitable position, all the while assuming a strict tone of voice.
And delivering crisp, firm smacks with my hand felt right, as did ordering him to call me mistress and scold him as I spanked. As I put him through the various implements (leather paddle, wooden spoon and hairbrush for those of you who like detail)I found I quite liked this new view from the Top!
It was actually quite enjoyable to create these feelings of pain and pleasure for someone else, to choose the precise area to smack, changing the rhythm and speed, deciding how hard or soft to land them, noting his reactions, drawing out whimpers and yelps, and then pausing every so often to rub his bottom gently and admire this new view.
And then to repeat it all again with a fellow bottom who I usually can't watch being spanked cos I feel her pain too much.
Have I just become a switch? Or is this a newbie rite of passage ;)
2 comments:
It's a funny one but as long as you both enjoyed it then do labels really matter? I would say without a doubt that I'm a sub/bottom but sometimes I get switchy inclinations (usually in a fairly silly and capricious way) and think very occasionally swapping to the dark side is no bad thing :)
I would say you would need to wait before declaring yourself a switch. Maybe it was the moment which took you.
As you know I switch (but am I a 'switch'?) but really I am a 'bottom' or my phrase a 'spankee'. I usually say I am 95% spankee instead of a 'switch'.
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