Wednesday, May 27

Sweet little lies

Yesterday I blogged about the difficulties of keeping my kinky lifestyle a secret from my vanilla friends. One of the biggest problems is trying to fit kinky events such as play weekends or club nights into the vanilla calendar and then tying to come up with a plausible excuse for missing such and such's birthday night out or not making that family dinner etc.

And as my friends are used to knowing every detail of my week I usually have to come up with some description of where I was or what I was at. Not helped by living with two of my friends!

It can be exhausting coming up with the stories and trying to remember what I've told to whom. Luckily for me I'm a fantastic liar when circumstances require. I really shouldn't be so proud of it, but it's come in so useful lately.

I'm one of those liars who believes in details, no vague "I'm off to visit an old friend, you wouldn't know them" for me; I have backgrounds, plots and characters! And my friend in the know is very useful for an alibi for club nights, always coming up with a band that we've been to see, where they played and how good they were!

I've even managed to create a fictional boyfriend living abroad to explain my increasingly frequent trips away. This also comes in useful for getting out of their matchmaking attempts with 'eligible' types. (Hmmm can he use a cane? No? Sorry not eligible then.)

He's actually based on one of my kinky Irish friends here who happens to live in Europe at the minute, and he knows that I'm shamelessly using him. I'm thinking of moving him from Europe to London though as that's where my travels are taking me lately.

Unfortunately the story has been going on so long that my friends think we are a serious item at the minute and want to meet him! So I'll probably have to be dumped which will then give me an excuse for 'staying in' and not being interested in any men at all, at least for a few weeks. But how shall I do it? Girlfriend on the side? Actually gay?

Or I could just tell the truth, he's a pervert interested in putting me across his knee and spanking my bare bottom. Hmmmm, that could just work....


Saffron said...

Oh I feel your pain. I walk in predominantly vanilla circles - and so tell me do I tell my oldest friend that I want to stay with them, in London the night after, or before my first spanking or spanking party?

Tell me huh?

I so feel your pain on this. On top of that, my closest friends cannot know about this kink of mine, and that really does make it difficult, because this kink is part of me. Very much a part of me. And because I am an open book normally. Sheesh. What do I do?

Unknown said...

"Or I could just tell the truth, he's a pervert interested in putting me across his knee and spanking my bare bottom. Hmmmm, that could just work...." - Pervert for Hire!! Emma !!

Caroline Grey said...

LOL I did not know about the imaginary boyfriend! Clever!

I actually do have a few vanilla friends that I met in the States who live around England and Europe. I sometimes go to "visit" them, or to their imaginary weddings or hen parties. The really shameful thing is that I haven't actually been to visit any of them since I moved over here--all of our travel budget seems to go to kinky things. You've got to prioritize!

Eliane said...

Ah, very clever, the imaginary boyfried. I have the odd vanilla friend who tries to set me up with "a nice man". It can be somewhat hard (read impossible) to explain that you're not interested, thank you very much, because nice though he may be, kinky he isn't. As you say "can handle a cane and isn't afraid to take me over his knee once in a while" are not really things you can list for those friends!

Master Retep said...

Take care Caroline, you might marry the same friend off too often to be credible. As a social excuse, both for kink and days off work, weddings and funerals can be a bit dodgy.

MecIrlandais said...

Whoever he is I hope he's a handsome chap!

Again I find myself emphathising & identifying with the the problems mentioned here. Though at the same time I have very much enjoyed the (blackish) humour too!