Saturday, March 13

Your Kink is OK

A few days ago Lollipop and I were enjoying a catch-up over dinner and doughnuts (mmmm doughnuts). We hadn't seen each other in over a week and there was so much information to exchange.

In the midst of telling her about my last weekend with HH I opened up the cheer leading photos on my laptop to show her. When showing her such kinky photos I tend to show her only the outfits - she likes those as much as I do and loves helping me plan what to wear. So I tend not to show her any of my bottom, but as we flicked through the photos we came across a few by accident.

She was really fine with it and not at all phased, whereas I feel uncomfortable 'subjecting' her to pics of my naked bottom. I'm not so sure I'd be as tolerant of pics of her naked bottom - as lovely as I'm sure it would be. But I only like kinky bottoms, i.e. ones that are marked, or in nice panties about to be spanked. The kinky context makes it OK to see my friends' bottoms, but otherwise it would feel weird.

My hypocracy became even more apparent when we then got into a spirited argument about Lollipop wanting to dye her hair turquoise. After much back and forth I finally giggled: 'you can't, it'd just be too weird'

There was a sudden pause until we both burst out in uncontrollable laughter and I voiced what she was thinking. 'OK, it's not as weird as dressing up in a school uniform and letting someone beat me to tears, of course'

Hmmm I should probably at least try to be more tolerant!


Paul said...

EmmaJane, hear, hear, tolerance is mostly a good thing, especially when we are talking about kink.
Warm hugs,

Master Retep said...

This simple little story is actually a very insightful comment on "normalisation". It is amazing how quickly the shock value of a party scene is absorbed by us and we do still need to be careful in overestimating how accepting our vanilla world would be of TTWD. Well done on finding a 'nilla friend to come out to.

Graham said...

Isn't it great when 'nilla friends are chill about it? I'm able to share pretty much everything with my best friend even though she doesn't share the kink (or, The Activity as I recently started calling it in convos with her) and being able to count on that openness and support is so important.

So yay Lollipop! And happy hair-dyeing : )

(Ok, the word verification is 'unsub.' HA. Fact.)

Bonnie said...


Yes, yes, yes! I find myself caught in my own small hypocrisies from time to time. While we may in our own minds believe that *our* kinks are totally normal (and I stand on that position), it's all too easy to reject someone else's kink as weird.

Hooray for openness and tolerance!


Karl Friedrich Gauss said...

Always fascinating to see how our "Activity", as Graham so aptly calls it, comes across to a vanilla audience.

EmmaJane said...

@Bonnie - yes it's hard not to be a hyocrite sometimes. I remember one night at our local club seeing a guy in an ewok question and I thought that's weird. Then looked down at me in my very authentic school uniform and laughed at myself!

@Paul/Graham/Maser Retep/ Karl And yes I agree the vanilla perspective is fascinating and I'm lucky to have it. Lollipop is pretty special in that she just accepts it for what it is, no forced interest or understanding. Her natural, open reaction makes me very comfortable!